The new year has silently crawled in. What year is it now? 2011? I am not sure anymore, since calendars started to lie to me every day. I have to find a way to tell dates from the sun, as several smart people do with time.
The snow this year – and the last days of the previous one, too – is so white that it blinds. Even the usual greyness of Moscow cannot kill its whiteness. It is not snow perhaps, but a mantle of white marble that has covered the whole city. Marble streets, marble clouds on a marble sky, marble cars with marble passengers, marble people holding marble hands… “And the twelve Gods leapt up in marble fear” – echoes a quote from Wilde’s “Charmides” in my head. Yes, and marble Gods, too.
And this marble shows that everthing is changing and nothing changes at all.
Last year was the year of anachronisms and sighs, smell of old books and bones aching from tenderness. The year of Lorca and Cernuda, the year of Albeniz and Vertinsky. Apart from that, it was the year of debuts: my work at RT, my published poem translations (oh, forgive me, don Luis!) and my reading of them in front of people I admire, my uni studies and, and… Everything.
Maybe I should try to write down a few resolutions to see if I make true at least one of them? No poetry, only prose. No common phrases, only strict aims.
- to finally start publishing articles under my own name.
- to publish an article on paper.
- to publish some translations without any influence or help.
- to start making money somehow.
- to finish that goddamn “Viento en la colina”.
- to learn how to knit and not forget it after 24 hours.
- to learn the whole “Asturias” by Albeniz on guitar.
- to go to Novgorod once again.
- to make my own radio program on FMGU.
- to learn how to play castanets.
All? That’s all. I cannot function without severe borders. And here they are. And while you’re being surprised by my shallowness and prozaicness, I’ll leave you to go and carve these resolutions in marble.
~ by Anna on January 19, 2011.